A Little About Tanya: I have known Tanya since I was 13 years old. And, NO … I am not about to tell you how long we have been friends. But, lets just say that we have had the pleasure of being part of each other’s journey. As a friend, it was particularly hard for me to watch Tanya experience any kind of pain. But, if ever I have met someone whose life is a testimony, it would be her. She maintained a buoyant spirit, because she knew, even in the thick of it, that In God’s Hands Intended Evil becomes Eventual Good. Her story is one of perseverance, triumph, and strength. And, I am proud of her for sharing her story and her truth. I sincerely hope that you will run out and her purchase her book, The Moment I Decided to Own It. (Follow the link to purchase on Amazon)
When did you know in your heart that it was time for you to move on?
When the tone in his voice changed. We used to speak and you could hear that he cared and loved me and then one day I realized there was absolutely no love in his voice. It was cold and direct and I realized that I no longer possessed his heart
What signs did you see or that you now recognize in retrospect?
The signs had always been there. The lying was there, the cheating was there but I became so comfortable in my dysfunction or dysfunctional marriage that I chose not to leave. I chose to act as if it were out of sight out of mind to keep my sanity, because my former husband was either deployed a lot while in the military or working as a contractor overseas for the last 10 years of our marriage.
What convinced you to turn your trial into a testimony and essentially a victory?
This book started off as a conversation between myself and a very close friend. I was telling her about some of the difficulties and frustration that I was feeling while going through my divorce and dealing with my soon-to-be ex husband. And she said, girl you need to write a book because nobody would really believe everything that you’ve been through. I proceeded to tell her nobody wants to really hear my story and she said yes they do. So on a Sunday night two years ago I started to write
Was the process of writing the book healing for you?
Definitely!! While writing this book I had to revisit some very painful moments and instead of just tucking them away as if they never existed, I had to truly deal with them. Looking at my pain face to face and not backing down. I had to rip off Band-Aids and shed a lot of tears, but after I did that my soul started to heal.
Explain how you felt when the book was complete?
That final moment when the book was completed I truly felt accomplished. I had that AHA moment. I thought that this baby that I was carrying for the last two years was finally here.
Advice for wives? Advice for young ladies starting out in a relationship?
The advice that I have for wives is don’t become complacent with your heart don’t allow other people to take that precious gift that you’re offering to them for granted. The advice that I have for young ladies is never settle. If you are unhappy in your present situation, do not allow yourself to feel that this is the best you can get. And ALWAYS trust your gut instincts. If I had trusted my own 20 years ago my life could’ve been very different. But, please don’t misunderstand, I do not regret any of the decisions that I made because as a product of that union, I have five magnificent beautiful children.
Favorite Quote from The Moment I Decided to Own It:
“I have to get through today, to get to tomorrow, because tomorrow has to be better than today.”
Favorite Book : I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings
Favorite Author: Maya Angelou
Favorite Quote or Motto: When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time. – Maya Angelou –
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or On Her Website