Tag Archives: motherhood

5 Ways Being A Mom Has Changed Me

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Being a Mom has changed me, in fact it honestly continues to change me every day.  Before I had kids, I was very confident in the fact that I knew almost everything, but, boy was I wrong.  I am not sure that anything can adequately prepare you for motherhood.

Perspective:  Being a Mom has forever changed my perspective on life.  I no longer believe that things are just black and white.  In fact, the gray areas far surpass any other.  Through the eyes of my children, I have seen things in ways that I don’t think I ever would have otherwise.  Because they are still so young, and tend to see the world without cynicism and fear.  And, because of them I try my hardest to be less judgmental and dogmatic.

Patience:  I am not sure you can successfully parent without some kind of patience.  Yet, I fear this will be a lesson I will continue to learn for my whole life.  There is no way that you can hear your name called over and over again, in various octaves and within 3 minutes, without having to exercise patience.

Understanding:  I think the older we get, the less sympathetic we become. We start to become easily annoyed with things that we feel require simple common sense and effort.  But, after becoming the parent of little people, I find myself being a little more compassionate towards other people’s plights.

Forgiveness:  Crayons on Walls, Vaseline all over faces… General messes… and the older they  get hurt feelings… Motherhood is a daily exercise in forgiveness.  I know I am not alone in feeling this way.  You clean up a room, only to have it destroyed moments later, by the cutest little thing you have ever seen.  Or you drive your teenager all over town, only to have him throw a hissy fit, because you won’t get back in the car to take him somewhere else.

Love:  I know it sounds cliche, but children do teach you the true meaning of unconditional love.  You love your spouse, or your significant other, but… you have very real and very definable expectations where they are concerned. Not that you do not have expectations of your children, but when they fall short you are the one who has to be there to pick them up, dust them off, and give them that needed push to get back on the horse.

I would be remiss if I did not say that being a Mom, is one of the hardest jobs that I have ever had.  It is challenging, it is rewarding, and sometimes it is a thankless job.  There are days when I feel unappreciated and burnt out.  But, the ups far outweigh the downs, and for that I am forever grateful.  God entrusted me with these little souls to love, to cherish and to mold, and even when it’s not easy, I intend to do just that.

How has being a Mom changed you?

A Quest for Answers: Motherhood Part 1

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“The days are long, but the years are short.” – Gretchen Ruben

Summer Break is over, here at our house, so I am trying to jump in with both feet, and get back into a Blogging Routine.   In a previous post, I Walk The Line, I promised to share with you some of the findings that I came across about Motherhood.

So here goes… I reached out to several Mothers in my Circle.  Surprisingly, I think they were all a little reluctant.  But, I get it, no one really wants their parenting called into question.  So I offered to post each response anonymously.

Mom 1 writes:

Honestly, I am both humbled and honored when someone mentions that I’m doing a great job parenting. I can’t tell you how many times I felt like I was doing a terrible job…cuz it’s a really tough job! Parenting is particularly challenging if you have more than one child, since each child requires customized parenting…that’s just my opinion.

I have three daughters. What works for my youngest daughter, does not work for my older twin daughters, and I’m convinced it has nothing to do with the age difference. It’s sheer personality!

Here’s one rule of thumb. As parents, I believe investing individual quality time with each child makes a world of difference. You’ll learn how to communicate with that individual child, separate from communicating with all your children as a group. You’ll find that this is more effective if your children all feel they are perceived as individuals with unique needs. They will respect and honor your views more. Try that for a change!

My Notes:  I really loved what Mom 1 had to say.  Especially because it’s easy to fall into the habit of trying to get everyone on the same page in a family setting. But, more often than not, EVERYONE really is not going to enjoy the same things.  I remember growing up my Mom made these awesome Chicken Croquettes, (which reminds me, I need to get that recipe), and we(my sister and I), loved them.   At some point, she stopped making it and when we asked her why, she said because Daddy didn’t like them.  I remember thinking …. SOOO…. lol.  I am sure it was just easier for her to make something that everybody wanted to eat than have to cater to our individual preferences.  But, I remember thinking that we outnumbered Dad and certainly should have had the deciding vote.  I said all that to say, we all want to have our individual needs catered to.  As adults and yes, as children.  I will be trying(Key Words:trying) harder on my end to consider the needs of everyone.

Question for Thought:  Just like with anyone else, do we teach our children how to treat us? I recently asked a friend how she taught her children to recognize and accept that Mommy needs both quiet and alone time.  She didn’t have an answer.  And, I haven’t found one either.  But, I have a greater need to make that known now that I am a Stay At Home Mom.  Love you guys, but now that you are little older, we don’t have to be together ALL THE TIME.  I would love to hear your thoughts on this as well.  (Mind you this was written, as my four year old was sitting as close to me as was humanly possible.  I literally had to put my headphones on in order to get in a good writing space.

Are you Interested in Teaching Your Children to Be Givers?        Check out this Great Post by Money Saving Mom.