A Quest for Answers: Motherhood Part 1

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“The days are long, but the years are short.” – Gretchen Ruben

Summer Break is over, here at our house, so I am trying to jump in with both feet, and get back into a Blogging Routine.   In a previous post, I Walk The Line, I promised to share with you some of the findings that I came across about Motherhood.

So here goes… I reached out to several Mothers in my Circle.  Surprisingly, I think they were all a little reluctant.  But, I get it, no one really wants their parenting called into question.  So I offered to post each response anonymously.

Mom 1 writes:

Honestly, I am both humbled and honored when someone mentions that I’m doing a great job parenting. I can’t tell you how many times I felt like I was doing a terrible job…cuz it’s a really tough job! Parenting is particularly challenging if you have more than one child, since each child requires customized parenting…that’s just my opinion.

I have three daughters. What works for my youngest daughter, does not work for my older twin daughters, and I’m convinced it has nothing to do with the age difference. It’s sheer personality!

Here’s one rule of thumb. As parents, I believe investing individual quality time with each child makes a world of difference. You’ll learn how to communicate with that individual child, separate from communicating with all your children as a group. You’ll find that this is more effective if your children all feel they are perceived as individuals with unique needs. They will respect and honor your views more. Try that for a change!

My Notes:  I really loved what Mom 1 had to say.  Especially because it’s easy to fall into the habit of trying to get everyone on the same page in a family setting. But, more often than not, EVERYONE really is not going to enjoy the same things.  I remember growing up my Mom made these awesome Chicken Croquettes, (which reminds me, I need to get that recipe), and we(my sister and I), loved them.   At some point, she stopped making it and when we asked her why, she said because Daddy didn’t like them.  I remember thinking …. SOOO…. lol.  I am sure it was just easier for her to make something that everybody wanted to eat than have to cater to our individual preferences.  But, I remember thinking that we outnumbered Dad and certainly should have had the deciding vote.  I said all that to say, we all want to have our individual needs catered to.  As adults and yes, as children.  I will be trying(Key Words:trying) harder on my end to consider the needs of everyone.

Question for Thought:  Just like with anyone else, do we teach our children how to treat us? I recently asked a friend how she taught her children to recognize and accept that Mommy needs both quiet and alone time.  She didn’t have an answer.  And, I haven’t found one either.  But, I have a greater need to make that known now that I am a Stay At Home Mom.  Love you guys, but now that you are little older, we don’t have to be together ALL THE TIME.  I would love to hear your thoughts on this as well.  (Mind you this was written, as my four year old was sitting as close to me as was humanly possible.  I literally had to put my headphones on in order to get in a good writing space.

Are you Interested in Teaching Your Children to Be Givers?        Check out this Great Post by Money Saving Mom.