Category Archives: Life Lessons

Keeping The Faith in Uncertain Times

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Keeping The Faith In Uncertain Times

Lately, I have been in a funk.  I am still figuring out exactly why that is.  But, I think part of the reasoning behind my mood is the “Janky” State of Affairs in  the World.  There used to be a time when I felt like I could safely tell my children that if they carried themselves with integrity and pride, that they could expect to be treated with respect and dignity.  But, those days seem to have come and gone.  Honestly, I suppose that I was a bit naive to have believed that in the first place.  But, there is something generally unsettling about being shaken out of your comfort zone.   The job of every Mom is to be able to protect their children, while molding and shaping them, or at the very least directing them in their pursuits.  But, as an African American Mom raising African American kids these basic desires are not as clean cut as you think.

Over the last 5+, I have sat on my bed or on my couch or in my car and listened in horror to countless accounts of individuals being slaughtered and murdered for no other reason than that they happened to be black.  A gift that I gave my children, meaning my inherit blackness was passed on to my babies. Trayvon Martin, Philando Castile, Eric Garner, Tamir Rice, Alton B. Sterling and Sandra Bland, just to name a few.   And that is terrifying.  As I sit here typing this with tears rolling down my cheeks.  I find myself feeling both fearful and inadequate, because ultimately I do not have what I need to do the most important job that I have been given.

As if that was not more than enough, Gun Violence continues to rise, the Me Too Movement has made its way to the forefront, and both the present administration and those running for office have resorted to using fear as a means of persuation.  It seems as though no one is required to stand in their truth anymore.  How do I teach accountability to my chidren in a world where there seems to be so little?  Once I manage to move past that immobilizing feeling.  I remember that in times of uncertainty, I truly only have one thing that I can depend on and in my case it’s my faith.

Growing up in the church, and in a very religious household, I often heard my Mom call on Jesus in times when no one and nothing else could help.  I believe that she provided me with the foundation on which to develop my own personal relationship with Christ.  And for that I thank her.  Now, that I have children of my own, I hope to instill in them the same value system that she instilled in me.  I know that I will not always be able to protect them from the evils of the world, but I hope that they will remember the devotions that we read together, and the prayers we said over problems big and small.  I hope that their strength will come from the original Author and Finisher and they will know that “All Things Work Together For Them That Love The Lord.”  If I am honest, I will admit that my walk with Christ is forever changing.  I am always in pursuit of  stronger relationship and a deeper understanding.

In my own personal valleys, and when I feel myself sinking into depression or even having  a Crisis of Faith, these are my Go Tos.

The Bible /Devotions:  I will probably pick up a Devotional book before I pick up the Bible.  Don’t kill me, I know a lot of people will not want to hear that.  But, I find it simpler to read and digest and it always directs me to verses in the bible that I may not have ever considered. I have often been able to bring to remembrance a scripture that would remind me of the promises that God gave to me.  And without a doubt, it can serve to put my mind at ease.

Music:  If you have been following this blog for a while, then you know that I love my music.  Music soothes my soul, on so many different levels.  It refocuses me, it brings my peace, it stirs my spirit in a way that nothing else can.  And, although I do love Contemporary Gospel.  Old Time Hymns often take me back to just where I need to go. This is one of my favorites.  If you have never heard of it, it’s worth a listen on YouTube.

“My Hope is Built on Nothing Less”
by Edward Mote, 1797-1874

1. My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus’ blood and righteousness;
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly lean on Jesus’ name.
On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

2. When darkness veils His lovely face,
I rest on His unchanging grace;
In every high and stormy gale
My anchor holds within the veil.
On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

3. His oath, His covenant, and blood
Support me in the whelming flood;
When every earthly prop gives way,
He then is all my Hope and Stay.
On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

4. When He shall come with trumpet sound,
Oh, may I then in Him be found,
Clothed in His righteousness alone,
Faultless to stand before the throne!
On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.  Source:

Lastly, The Fellowship of Like Minded People:  Let me explain, we all know that misery likes company.  It is the easiest thing in the world to find someone to commiserate on your frustration and your justifiable right to be miffed and unsettled.  These people very rarely offer solutions.  They offer fuel to a fire that ultimately needs to be extinguished.  They help you to fall further into an abyss.  Never reminding you that there is hope.  I won’t say that it is their intention, but likely they don’t know enough to send you down the right path.  But, someone who seeks to live in truth and light will often be more likely to try to lift you out of your “sunken place”, instead of contribute to it.  Find you some folks like that.  That I can guarantee, you will not regret.

FAITH IS LIKE WI-FI,  IT HAS THE POWER TO CONNECT YOU TO WHAT YOU NEED.

 

Reflecting on 2017

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2017 has come and gone.  Another year that has flown by, the kids are older, a few more gray hairs showing up and trying to stay and few more dreams realized and a few laid by the wayside.  As with every year, there have been ups and downs, but the beginning of the year has me reflecting back on all that 2017 had to offer.

lessons in 2017

I can’t exactly explain why, but I feel like 2017 was a year of real vulnerability for me.  I literally felt like I was walking around with all my nerve endings exposed.  I think I spent a good part of the year, wondering why that was, and then the other portion of the year trying to accept it.   According to one of my favorite authors Brene Brown, “Daring greatly means the courage to BE VULNERABLE.  It means to show up and be seen. To ask for what you need.  To talk about your feelings. To have the hard conversations.”  And, truthfully, these were all things that I tried to do in 2017 and it is something I plan to bring forward into 2018.  I will tell you that no matter the outcome, inserting vulnerability into your life tends to lesson the speculation.  If  you know what you want, go after it and don’t receive it, well then you know you tried.  If you tell someone what is expected of them, and they fail to meet your expectations, there is no more wondering if maybe they aren’t getting it. You know and so do they.

on a personal front

  • I now have a 21 year old and a 13 year old.  Geez… (Ok, maybe don’t tell anyone else that.  They will figure out just how old I am lol.)
  • i jumped head first into learning how to cook more low carb food options for myself and my family.
  • i maintained a great A1C , for the entire year.
  • We redesigned our 13 year old daughter’s room, to make it more fitting for a young lady.
  • Oooh… and I managed to total my car, just three days after it was paid off (head banging).

on a business front

  • Our Etsy Store hit 536 Etsy Sales.
  • Our NOLA poster became our Highest Selling Item.
  • Posters in General were the Highest Selling Category in the Store  for 2017.
  • We Added Physical Invitations to Our Shop.
  • We Made A Lot of Updates to the Blog.
  • Leaned Into Being An “Influencer”  on our Social Media Platforms.  By the way, are following us? (Links Above)

my favorite books from 2017

  • The Monkey On My Back by Debbi Morgan
  • Big Magic Elizabeth Gilbert
  • Remembering Whitney by Cissy Houston
  • Milk and Honey Rupi Kaur  **** (A Must Read)

As we embark upon our next adventure, the year 2018.  Always Remember, “Time is at once the most valuable and the most perishable of all our possessions.” – John Randolph

Mommy Hears and Understands

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Mommy Hears and Understands

May is Better Hearing and Speech Month. Each May, BHSM, provides an opportunity to raise awareness about communication disorders and the role of the American Speech – Language – Hearing Association in providing life-altering treatments. The theme for this year is “Communication, The Key to Connection.”   I am sure like most people, this month probably has little significance to you.  And up until my eldest daughter was born, it had little significance to me either.  However, in October of 2004, I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, with all her fingers and all her toes.  She was perfect in my eyes.  She was more than even my wildest dreams could have conjured up.  She was all sugar and spice rolled into one.  As she grew older, like any parents we anxiously anticipated her first words.  Every mother longs for the day when they hear the words Momma cross their little ones lips.   But, those sweet words would be delayed.  Obviously concerned with the delay, we spoke to her pediatrician and she agreed that our daughter needed to be evaluated by a Speech Language Pathologist.  The tests that were needed were difficult at best for a small child, who was terrified of strangers.  It was a trying time.

After some time, she was diagnosed with Auditory Processing Disorder.  Honestly, they might as well have told me that she had Astronaut’s Disease, because I had no idea what it meant, and or what it entailed.  I consider myself to be pretty bright, but even after they explained it to me, I was still grasping at straws.  If I were to give you a layman’s description of what it is, it would go a little something like this, how she hears and processes sound is different than you and I.  Even with the diagnosis,  I had no idea what lay ahead of us.  At the age of 2, she was assigned her very first Speech Language Pathologist. We could not have known what a significant role her SLP would play in her developmental progress.  She was able to relate to her as her therapist and on an interpersonal level.  Pulling her out of her shell, and getting her to be open up and  try new things was key. She started to attend Speech Therapy twice a week for an hour, and slowly her vocabulary began to grow.  We finally were able to hear and understand her.  But, it was no easy feat.    Learning to pronounce and enunciate her words was difficult for her.  After a while we could understand her, and those that were around her frequently could understand her but it was still hard for a stranger to pick up on what she was saying.

As the years went by, she continued to make progress.  When it was time for her to begin Kindergarten, we let the school know immediately about her speech delay, and provided them with her diagnosis and all the necessary documentation.  Soon into her first year it was evident that she was struggling.  As you know, Speech, Communication and Comprehension are huge components of the educational process.  It literally was hindering every part of her experience and it was heartbreaking.  With the help of an exceptional team, by the first grade she had a functioning IEP (Individualized Education Program).  For the second time, a new SLP was introduced into our lives.  And again, what she brought to the table made ALL the difference in the progress that my daughter would make. The SLP would sit with the teachers to see what they were teaching and how she could help.  She would incorporate the lessons being taught into their daily sessions.  To say she went above and beyond, is a drastic understatement.  She was able to pick up on her moods, her strengths and her weaknesses and she nurtured her in a way that I can not explain.    God knew exactly what we needed to make it through the journey.  And, when it was time for her to retire I was devastated.  I was truly sad to see her go and I was not sure how the change would affect the progress that we had already made.  But, she made the transition seemless and we went from one blessing to another.

The greatest blessing in this test for us, as a family and for our daughter has been receiving Speech Therapy.   We have been extremely blessed to have been paired with SLPs who have become more than what there jobs required, but true friends.  I always say that the way to any parent’s heart is through their children.  It is not often that you run across educators who have a genuine love and concern for your child.    Now, I am coming at this from the Speech side of things, simply because that is where our diagnosis took us.  But, Auditory and Speech issues affect children all across the board.  As is the case with most disabilities, early detection is very important.  There are many programs available to you, if you feel that you child could be struggling in this area.  If you think your child may be struggling with Speech and or Hearing Issues, check out this website, which is full of useful information and resources.

If our journey, that we are still on, has taught me anything it is this, it truly takes a village.  And, we could not be more thankful for ours.  Every Journey will be different, as no individual is the same.  Want to know more about Auditory Processing Disorders?  Here is the first book I read about it at the start of our journey.

“INDIVIDUAL COMMITMENT TO A GROUP EFFORT – THAT IS WHAT MAKES A TEAM WORK, A COMPANY WORK, A SOCIETY WORK, A CIVILIZATION WORK.” – VINCE LOMBARDI

Our Visit to the King Center: A Photo Blog

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Visit to the King Center : Martin Luther King Jr. National Historic Site

Earlier this month, we loaded the kids up in the car and went to visit the King Center.  My older daughter had been to the King Center before, but unfortunately she was too little to have really understood exactly what the Civil Rights movement or Dr. King’s dream was about.  And so, with  blatant racism, and bigotry being displayed everywhere these days, we thought that it was important for us to remind our children of their significant heritage.

As a parent, I always err on the side of caution when it comes to telling my kids the gruesome and graphic details of life/history.  My philosophy on that is that they have their whole lives to be adults and to deal with such things.  And, I simply don’t want them living in fear.  But, as we were walking through the King Museum and I was trying my best to answer all their questions and explain the things we saw.  I was reminded that the Civil Rights movement was not just for adults.  There were several children on the front lines standing up for what they believed was right.  And, it brought me back to the famous quote by George Santayana, “that those who can not remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”

Surprisingly enough, I do not have too much to say about our trip other than to say that it was a humbling and solemn experience.  It filled me with both great pride and waves of grief.  Pride because of the long journey that our ancestors took on behalf of the very inalienable rights we are supposed to have today.  And, grief for those who lost their loved ones in the struggle and continue to do so in the name of upward mobility and dreams yet to be actualized.

Visit to the King Center - A Day On ... Not A Day Off

A Visit to the King Center : Call To Lead

A Visit to the King Center: Signs from Marches

A Visit to the King Center: Freedom March

I'm Black and Beautiful.

I hope that you enjoyed these pictures that my husband took and, if you are ever in the Atlanta area definitely put this on your list of places to see.  It’s an experience you won’t soon forget.  How do you deal with telling your children about things that are unpleasant?  Do you sugar coat it, or give it to them straight?  I’d love to hear your thoughts on this, in the comments below.

Setting the Stage for an Event to Remember

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Setting the Stage Hero Image 1

When did you first know that event planning was your passion and what made you want to do this as a business?

When my first daughter was born her birthdays were not normal or typical, they were a show. Everyone looked forward to the next year and it became a holiday of its own. It was a few years after her first birthdays that I finally said to myself that I really enjoy creating events for people and the joy it brought gave me delight.

When was your company started?

Although I had been doing events since childhood and really got into it when my daughter was born in 2002, C&R Promotions officially started in 2007. My then boyfriend, now husband, and I both felt like all the details that I put into my events were evidence that I needed to plan for others.

What has been your favorite event to plan to date and why? 

Choosing a favorite event is hard, but I think it was obvious. I have done so many events for close family and small events for friends and I even did my own wedding, but the event that I chose as my favorite was for my brother-in-law in May 2016. It was an all white affair with a rustic, country feel. There were accents of gold and burlap. I chose this as my favorite because one, I had complete control basically and my visions are sometimes hard to explain. Secondly, is was the most put together event thus far. I finished way before the event start time and did not feel rushed or like something was missing. Moreover, people outside of close friends and family finally could see first hand what C & R Promotions was capable of.

Setting the Stage for an Event to Remember: Guest Blog Roberta Isom

All White Party Event Styled by C& R Promotions

Give your philosophy on party planning.

My philosophy of planning is not like others, I don’t believe. In 2004, I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS). It took a toll on how I processed information and remembered information. I began to make list of things to remember on a daily basis, I was in school and had to have things in order or the information would be lost, and everyday tasks were documented in order to stay organized. So, when I decided to start event planning, the order of things needed to stay the same. I believe that with well planned buying schedules and organization, anyone can afford the event of their dreams on a minimum budget. I have yet to feel that I cannot handle any budget and make a customer’s dream come true. Everyone has the choice to choose to party!

What are some tips you can give on how to do more with less?

To do more with less takes preparation. If you take time to find deals and set up a realistic plan for you event you can always save money and have everything that you want.

How do you balance your home and work life?

Never really figured out how to successfully balance home and work since I work from home, but having the ability to start and stop work throughout the day makes life a lot easier for me.

Causes you support, hobbies, favorite pass times?

I am a proud supporter of the Multiple Sclerosis Society and have done numerous events to contribute to finding a cure. My most recent cause is autism. I have a small cousin that was diagnosed at three and have seen his progress and hope that one day we both can say we have overcome a disease. I do not have many hobbies. In my spare time I am usually finding ways to promote my business or how to make something great for an event.

Getting A Little Personal..
Being diagnosed in 2004, with MS has changed my life. For most of the beginning years I was in denial, I was depressed, and I just could not deal. However, I took the diagnosis and began to help others manage and found an inner strength that only God knows where it came from. Everything was different and I had to either accept it or stop living. I chose to live. I chose to take my illness and become someone that people could look up to. My family and friends were supportive and their passion to help me made me want to help myself. Having MS is the reason I plan the events in the manner that I do.  MS helped me become a planner, a manager, an entrepreneur. I wish there was a cure, but under the circumstances, I would not be who I am without MS.

Where Can You Be Found Across the Internet? (clickable links)

Facebook

Instagram

Twitter

Roberta Isom and Family

Roberta Isom, Owner/Proprietor of C& R Promotions

Roberta, the sixth child of eight, was raised in a single parent home with her three brothers and and four sisters. Throughout her childhood and beyond she managed to stay a star student and earn an associate’s, bachelor’s and master’s degree in various fields. Although being diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis in 2004, she has managed to stay active and has a progressing business as an event planner. She is a mother of two girls, 2 and 14, and a wife and looks forward to reaching new heights in the future.

bts

 

 

 

When I asked Roberta to do this Guest Interview, I truly wasn’t sure what her answer would be.  But, I was very pleased when she said yes.  I knew that not only would I be asking her about her passion for Event Planning, but I would be asking her to share some truly personal parts of her life with my readers.  But, she rolled with it and held nothing back.  If you reside in Birmingham, Metro Atlanta and or Eufaula, Alabama her services are available to you.  Be sure to follow her on her Social Media Channels listed above to keep up with her ever growing Event Planning company. Roberta has a birthday coming up.  Help her celebrate by donating to her cause here.

7 Things Every Parent Should Know

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7 Things Every Parent Should Know - www.stage-presents.com

  1.  Every child is different.  I think sometimes we base our parenting styles and decisions on how things worked the first time around, or how our parent’s raised us. I have three children and they couldn’t be more different.  Growing up, I remember thinking that my sister had it so much easier, because I had already gone through all of the hard things.  And, that my mom favored her over me, which.. well I am still not sure that isn’t entirely true, lol.  But… now that I have children of my own I know that what worked for one of them wouldn’t necessarily work for the other.
  2. There is no such thing as the perfect parent.  Even though it is what we all aspire to be, we would save ourselves so much time right out of the gate, by acknowledging from the very beginning that we are human, and therefore flawed. There will be times when you have to say you are sorry.  You will not always be right.  You are charged with shaping these little lives that have been entrusted to you, but try as you might you can’t mold them into your own image.  (Trust me I’ve tried, lol)
  3. Quality and Quantity.  I know you probably thought I was going to say  Quality over Quantity.  But Nope.  Here’s is my reasoning you are probably never going to be able to please everyone see #1.  And, even though you will most likely try to find things that everyone is interested in and or try to give them as much one on one time, as possible.  That simply may not be the way that they remember it.  So do you best to spend as much time as you can, whenever you can.  And hope that it is enough.
  4. Routine. Routine is the key to any well oiled machine.  Bed times, chores, expectations, etc.  As I mentioned before, I thought my parents were too strict.  But, the thing about it is that looking back I see now that knowing what was expected of me and how I was to conduct myself played a large part in shaping me.  I can see now that a lot of the heartache that my friends went through I was lucky enough not to have experienced, because I simply didn’t live that life.
  5. Enjoy it.  I will be the first one to tell you that parenthood is NO WALK IN THE PARK.   You love your babies and you can’t imagine life without them.  But, sometimes you do.  You imagine what it would be like to pull your hands through you hair, throw on some bright red lipstick and skinny jeans and just jump in the car heading off to God knows where and for God knows what reason.  But, you know those days are over.  So once you are back from your pity party.  Make sure to enjoy these days.  One day you will miss it.  Since my oldest is 20 and my youngest is 6, I have a unique vantage point.  I can see the other side while still in the trenches.
  6. Document your days.  This is a controversial one for some people, because if you are snapping pictures then maybe you aren’t present.  I guess I have mixed feelings about this, because I see things from behind a lens that I am not sure I would notice otherwise.  Or maybe it’s that the things that I see make me want to pull out my camera to preserve the memory.  Like taking my daughters to the beach last year, and watching their faces so go from fear, to fun, to frolicking.  It was amazing to sit there and watch them grow before my eyes.  To me, it’s equally amazing to look back on those pictures and remember that day with joy in my heart.  I think I have always taken a lot of pictures, but when my son was little there were no iPhone’s and such, so there are way less pics of him than of the girls, and it is one of my biggest regrets.
  7. We Time and Me Time are a necessity.  Before they came, it was just the two of you.  And, before you became the two of you, it was just you.  Every relationship needs cultivation, even the ones we have with ourselves.  And, I believe this with all my heart.  If you are depleted at some time in some way, it is going to come out.  I am lucky enough to have my parents close by and when I need a break they are more than happy to afford us that luxury.  But, even if you don’t have a support system close by, little things mean a lot.  Can you both get off work for a couple of hours while the kids are at school, for lunch or for a movie or both?  Can you schedule a babysitter, and make a night of it?  Or maybe you just need the peace and quiet, or solitude of a massage, or mani-pedi appointment.  Figure out what feeds your spirit and your soul and do that, make time for that.

“TODAY’S LITTLE MOMENTS,  BECOME TOMORROW’S PRECIOUS MEMORIES.”

Advocating for your Child’s Future

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Advocating for Your Child's Future - Does your Child require an IEP? Do you need to know what lies ahead of you? Be an advocate for your child's future with these tips from a fellow IEP Mom.

Being a parent is the hardest job that I have ever been entrusted with for all the obvious reasons.  There is no manual, no two children are the same, my normal way of creating templates that I can repeat mindlessly doesn’t work here.  All the ways that I can work smarter rather than harder in other roles, can not be applied to this job.  I learned very early on that parenting was just not a job that I could prepare for. I bought everything on the suggested nursery list, and tried to anticipate any need I felt that they would have before they arrived.  But… still there were just things that could not be anticipated .

It is often said that a parent is a child’s first teacher and also their first example of God’s love.  Both scary sentiments, if you ask me, but equally true.  And, as such it is our responsibility to advocate for them and their needs.  I don’t often talk about my daughter and her speech and educational challenges, and I think most people keep these things within the family.  But, recently the thought occurred to me that there are parents who do not advocate for their children because they are afraid, embarrassed, uncertain and unaware of the resources that are available to them.  And I don’t know, maybe I would have felt this way too if I was not surrounded by knowledgeable friends and family who were able to point me in the right direction.

Even though my daughter is just 11 years old, I feel like we have already been on quite a journey together.  At an early age she was diagnosed with a Significant Speech Delay and Auditory Processing Disorder.  She has been in Speech Therapy since she was 3 years old and has had an IEP since the 1st grade.  I know first hand how hard it is to accept that your child has a delay or special needs that make her different.   But, once you come to peace with this, the world is literally your oyster.  Now, I won’t lie to you and tell you that the sea will part and the mountains will crumble.  You are in for an uphill battle, but one that is possible and even if progress is slow, one that can be rewarding.

  1.  Know your child’s strengths and weaknesses.  What I mean by that is,  be an expert on your child.  Don’t allow anyone else to tell you what will work for him or her.  When my daughter started school, she was VERY VERY VERY shy.  Now, I am sure that you are thinking that most Kindergartners are.  And, that is true.  But, in her case, it took her a while to warm up to strangers.   And, I knew that.  So I let everyone who would be working with her know that.  She would also get frustrated when she was trying to express herself and others could not understand, and any kind of aggression towards her, made her shut down.  So I made all of that known.  In fact, call me a  “Helicopter Mom” if you like.  But, I would literally write a letter to the teachers at the beginning of the year to make sure that they went into the new school year knowing just who she was and the best way to reach her.
  2. Be diligent in your pursuit of services.  It is the public school systems responsibility to see to it that your child is educated.  You might think ok, well I can leave that there.  Wrong.  You can not.  There are seven different recognized learning styles.  Knowing which ones work  best for your child can improve both the speed and the quality of your child’s education.  That being said, If the arrangements that are set in place for your child are not working it is your responsibility to seek out a situation that better suits their needs.  The key to this is being involved enough to see the red flags.  For example. even though IEP’s are pretty common now a days, you may  have to request that your child be evaluated to determine if he or she needs one.  The meetings can be long and tedious, but it gives you an opportunity to both get your concerns across and work with those who come in contact with your child to make sure that he or she has the accommodations that she needs.  Extra time for testing, a Small Group Setting, or  Additional Study Skills just to name a few
  3. Build a team.  I was beyond lucky when it came to my team.  And, I don’t just mean the people who interact with your child at school.  But, a support team, I had my Mom, my sister, and my husband who I felt were all equally vested in my daughter’s success.  And then as fate would have it, the very first Speech Therapist that the school paired her with was hand picked by God.  She was able to pull my daughter outside of herself and give her some of the confidence that she was lacking by helping her with her speech and by her sweet and encouraging nature.  In addition to that , she was the gentle hand that guided the team at school that worked with her.
  4. Be both forgiving and flexible.  For me this was a new experience, so I say be forgiving because you are learning as you go.  But, even if this is not your first time at the rodeo, no experience is going to be the same.  And, sometimes the goals and milestones you put in place originally, will need to be revamped and changed, or even thrown out all together.
  5. Accept limitations.  As I said before things may not move as quickly as you would like, and that could be as far as how quickly your child is learning and making strides.  Or, it could mean how long it takes to get additional testing done or to receive additional  resources
  6. Don’t Give Up!!  This is the most important point that I will make in this whole post, because it is a frustrating process.  It is hard to see your child try and fail, and be discouraged.  It is hard for you not to become emotionally drained on their behalf.  Or to stop yourself from feeling like what you are doing is not yielding results.  But, you have to stay strong because you are the only one who can fight this fight for them.

” WHAT LIES BEHIND US AND WHAT LIES BEFORE US ARE TINY MATTERS COMPARED TO WHAT LIES WITHIN US.”   rALPH WALDO EMERSON

Our Differences are What Make us Stronger.

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In these uncertain times that we live in, I have often wondered if I could  change something in my world what would it be?  And, I am always brought back to to the same thing.  I wish that I could rid my world of hate and all of its byproducts, bigotry, racism, terrorism, crime, division, etc.   I am often floored by the fact that a country that was built on the premise of being a Melting Pot, despises those people who make it so.

Remembering Our Differences Are What Makes Us Stronger

The quote on the Statue of Liberty reads:

“Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand
A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame
Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name
Mother of Exiles. From her beacon-hand
Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command
The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame.
“Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!” cries she
With silent lips. “Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”

Quote by Emma Lazarus

These words grace the Statue that stands on Liberty Island in the New York Harbor.  They were meant to be welcoming to the masses.  This country was founded on the backs of immigrants and slaves.  People that came from all walks of life.  Our differences were supposed to be what made us better as a nation, what set us apart.  Most people who willingly migrated to this country did so with the hopes of finding religious freedom, a better opportunity, pursuing a new dream. With all of these noble intentions, I wonder how we got so far away from what was originally intended.

No-Hate1

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I cry for my children who even though they are growing up in the 21st century still live in a world crippled by enmity.  I cry for their futures, because even though we have come a long way.  We really haven’t come as far as you would think.

This blog has been sitting in my pending queue for some time now. But, I know that no matter how hard I try to write words that are politically correct, I will most likely still offend someone here.  But, being quiet has never really been my way, for that matter, neither has being PC.  That being said I just hope that someone, somewhere, will read my words and have pause.

For me,  my wishes and my dreams still mirror to this day, that of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., I hope that  “…my children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.”  And, not by their assumed character but by the mental and moral qualities distinctive to them.

“IT IS NOT OUR DIFFERENCES THAT DIVIDE US.  IT IS OUR INABILITY TO RECOGNIZE, ACCEPT AND CELEBRATE THOSE DIFFERENCES.” – AUDRE LORDE

Things I learned in my 30’s

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From Crayons to Perfume - Lessons Learned in my 30's

I can hardly believe that I’m 40 today.  I have battled with this more than a little bit.  I know that it beats all the alternatives ( i.e, not being alive).  But, still I am not sure I’m ready to accept it.   Each year has been a learning experience, teaching and un-teaching lessons.  And, with each day I become more and more comfortable in my own skin and I grow more confident in who I am and the things that I want and need. But, there have been some important things that I learned during my 30’s.

  • Being Called an Adult Doesn’t Make You One.  People will not always live up to your expectations, and you will not always live up to theirs.
  • Haste Makes Waste.  Take your time.  Think things through and be strategic whenever possible.
  • Love Yourself First… Warts and All.  Simply put, you can not expect others to love you if you do not love yourself and accept your own shortcomings.
  • You Probably Don’t Know More Than Your Parents.  Age affords you both experience and perspective.  I can admit today that I still don’t know as much as my mother does.  And her advice, unsolicited or not is usually sound.
  • Trust Your Gut.  I honestly believe for all intents and purposes you know a Lemon when you see one.
  • Don’t Let Fear Stop You From Achieving Your Goals.  I’ve done a lot of this.  It is something that I am still working on, but I feel like I have gotten better over time.
  • Struggle Builds Character.  NO ONE wants to struggle.  NO ONE wants to live in uncertainty.  But, who you come out being on the other side of that struggle.   Well, it can be amazing.
  • It’s Not Over Until It’s Over.  Whether you are 40 like I am today, or 70, if you have life and health and strength.  It Ain’t Over!!

Just for fun, I thought I would share some of my favorite/relevant/age approriate quotes with you.

Quotes on Life

Photo Source: MediaWebApps

Quotes on Women

And, if you got this far, as a special thanks for celebrating my birthday with me, I am offering a 15% off coupon for my birthday. Coupon Code: thebig40  Today Only.  So run by our Etsy Shop and save!!

Spring Break – Perfect in It’s Imperfection

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our “perfect yet not so perfect” spring break

Recap of Spring Break 2016 - www.stage-presents.com

Spring Break is over and things are getting back to normal around here.  I have been out of pocket for a few days, that normally happens over extended breaks.  The blog and the business run around my family life and not visa versa.  Last week was Spring Break, so I spent as much time as I could hanging out with my little ones.   I am always trying to teach my kids lessons that I am still learning and yes,  I know just how hypocritical that sounds. But, I guess it’s in hopes that by teaching the lesson, they  will avoid some of the same mistakes that I have made in my own life.  One of the things that I am always telling them is that they have to roll with the punches or that certain things are beyond their control and they are.  But, it is a lesson that I struggled hard with and for a  long time.  My mom always tells me that God will keep teaching me to be patient and understanding until I am both.  Spring Break was an exercise in just that.

Our trip to Florida for Spring Break was great!! But, I am not sure that you would have agreed taking it at face value.  I have been back and forth to Florida three times in less than 30 days.  Now, my sister lives there, but that has never happened before.  As I am sure you remember me saying in my last post, we lost my sweet niece on the 15th.  So, I went down when she was sick and was there when she passed.  I went back for the service and then I returned for Spring Break and to physically lay eyes on my sister.  Saying this to say there was a melancholy under tone to our trip, but we were determined to make some good memories, in spite of it.

The first night there we had date night.  We left all the kids with the nanny, and we went out and enjoyed some grown up time.  It was great to spend some time with my sister and her hubby that was just light and fun.  The next day we took the kids  to the Central Orlando zoo.  Now, if you know me at all, you know that outdoors and heat are not my thing, but the kids had a ball.  The highlight of the trip was to be our trip to the beach.  After all nothing says Spring Break like the beach.  On the day of the beach trip it was COLD… Yes, I said cold in Florida.  But, we went anyway thinking that maybe the weather would warm up.  When we arrived at the beach, the tides were so high that they actually closed the entrance to drive on to the beach.  After circling around we we were able to get in, and when we got on the beach and out of the car the wind was so fierce and sand was blowing everywhere.  So we had to vacate.  Talk about three disappointed girls, yes I said 3 because I included myself.  So pouts and all we packed back into the truck and headed to go get something to eat.  The plan was that we would eat and stay in the area for a while in hopes for a change in the weather.  But, the change never came so we ventured back to my sisters house.  On the way back, we decided that since they were already dressed to get wet we would take them to the “Splash Park” not too far from where we were.  By that time it was getting warmer, and though a little apprehensive at first, with each splash the beach became a distant memory and we once again in their good graces.

Since we paid for admission to the beach, hubby and I managed to escape back there later in the day, the kids stayed with my sissy and we got to have some one on one time.  I will consider that her anniversary gift to me this year.  Yesterday made 7 years since I married this man.  And, still just a couple of hours alone with him ALWAYS refresh my soul.  Even when I don’t feel like I need it.  So Shout out to him today + this was the first year that he was able to take off the entire week to spend with us.  Another Spring Break survived and enjoyed and now back to our regularly scheduled programming. (P.S. – I know there were no pictures of me.  But, you know how that it is, I am always the one behind the camera. #mommylife)

Time Spent with Family Quote - stage-presents.com

What did you do to celebrate Spring Break this year?  Feel like sharing, we would love to hear your story in the comment section below.

Check out Our Previous Spring Break Shenanigans Here.